To be honest becoming a parent scares me; terrifies me actually.
I never grew up around babies, I was the baby. I'm the youngest in my family and all my extended family never lived very close so I never got to experience what it was like to take care of an infant especially a new born. I think that most first time parents feel this way in some form or another which I have been told, but right now I feel kind of lost in between buying nursery furniture and diapers. I don't know what brads are the best what products are a must have.. I have no idea what I'm doing! I think I wont be really able to know what I'm doing until I figure out things with my own child.
Since I was a little girl, even some of my first memories where of me caring for my dolls. I would treat them like my own children, swaddle them, change their diapers, and push them in my mini stroller. As long as I can remember I have always wanted to be someones "Mommy". So that natural instinct that some have told me will just kick in as soon as they are born... I'm really hoping that I am blessed enough to have that. Maybe all those years caring for my dolls in such a human like way will help me somewhere. Haha.
But at the end of all the anxiety and worry that seems to cloud my mind; I couldn't be more happy to carry this life inside me. To make my body a home for our child for almost a year is an experience I will cherish forever. To feel the strong kicks, the hand or foot protruding on my side is one of the most amazing things. Even through this part is hard, the part that comes after is more rewarding then I'm sure I can imagine. I am growing so impatient to meet our little one and I'm sure by the end of the pregnancy I will be so ready to leap into parenthood, to nurture and care, to raise our child to love and serve God with all their being.
During this time that me and Luke have had just being us two, has built a strong foundation for our marriage, for our relationships with Jesus and ultimately creating a home filled with joy and a readiness to expand our family. God's timing is perfect and He knew that this child's life would bring so much joy and hope to me and Luke and so many others through a tough year. There are still bad days where the weight of life seems to encroach me on every side and when the dog eats my Subway sandwich, its the end of the world.... Haha! (This pregnancy has made me extremely weepy!) Praying for this little one has been something that has brought me a new perspective on what it means to hold things with an open hand. To let God use our child to glorify Him no matter what that looks like can be a scary thing to pray but ultimately this is our hearts desire. God knew our baby before they were even conceived how amazing is that!
Thank you Jesus for blessing us with this child and allowing us to be sanctified even more as we jump into this thing called parenthood. You have blessed us with so much.
I never grew up around babies, I was the baby. I'm the youngest in my family and all my extended family never lived very close so I never got to experience what it was like to take care of an infant especially a new born. I think that most first time parents feel this way in some form or another which I have been told, but right now I feel kind of lost in between buying nursery furniture and diapers. I don't know what brads are the best what products are a must have.. I have no idea what I'm doing! I think I wont be really able to know what I'm doing until I figure out things with my own child.
Since I was a little girl, even some of my first memories where of me caring for my dolls. I would treat them like my own children, swaddle them, change their diapers, and push them in my mini stroller. As long as I can remember I have always wanted to be someones "Mommy". So that natural instinct that some have told me will just kick in as soon as they are born... I'm really hoping that I am blessed enough to have that. Maybe all those years caring for my dolls in such a human like way will help me somewhere. Haha.
But at the end of all the anxiety and worry that seems to cloud my mind; I couldn't be more happy to carry this life inside me. To make my body a home for our child for almost a year is an experience I will cherish forever. To feel the strong kicks, the hand or foot protruding on my side is one of the most amazing things. Even through this part is hard, the part that comes after is more rewarding then I'm sure I can imagine. I am growing so impatient to meet our little one and I'm sure by the end of the pregnancy I will be so ready to leap into parenthood, to nurture and care, to raise our child to love and serve God with all their being.
During this time that me and Luke have had just being us two, has built a strong foundation for our marriage, for our relationships with Jesus and ultimately creating a home filled with joy and a readiness to expand our family. God's timing is perfect and He knew that this child's life would bring so much joy and hope to me and Luke and so many others through a tough year. There are still bad days where the weight of life seems to encroach me on every side and when the dog eats my Subway sandwich, its the end of the world.... Haha! (This pregnancy has made me extremely weepy!) Praying for this little one has been something that has brought me a new perspective on what it means to hold things with an open hand. To let God use our child to glorify Him no matter what that looks like can be a scary thing to pray but ultimately this is our hearts desire. God knew our baby before they were even conceived how amazing is that!
Thank you Jesus for blessing us with this child and allowing us to be sanctified even more as we jump into this thing called parenthood. You have blessed us with so much.
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